The Ghosts of Christmas Past

A girlfriend of mine recently suggested to me that the reason my relationship with "Boyfriend" had to stop was because he needed his last Hurrah and I needed to work out my ex issues (yeah who gets the better deal there). At first I thought she was wrong but the past few nights have shown me that I possibly may have never dealt properly with my feelings towards exes.

This became fairly clear to me last night. In a dream an ex who stomped my heart pretty bad my last year of college, in fact he still brings a groan out of friends when he is mentioned (yeah it was THAT bad) popped up in my dreams last night. Keep in mind this is a guy I haven't thought about in five years. And there he was in all his glory and my feelings towards him in the dream were the same I used to have.

Which got my wondering - when you are certain you have The One staring you in the face are you visited by the Ghosts of Christmas Past?

Granted "Boyfriend" does remind me of Very First Love Boyfriend but he didn't until we had our first kiss. At times we reminds me of Senior Year of College Heart Stomper, but thats mostly an attitude thing. Then on occasional the way he says something or the way he would grab at me reminded me of the Mechanic I Chased and when he's getting excited talking about something goofy or serious he reminds me of Studious History Guy. The way he looks at me and is protective of me reminds me of Right Guy Wrong Time Guy, the way he can be so sweet and doesn't realize it reminds me of Sophomore Year of HS Guy. His need to be independent and in control reminds me of Freshman Year Guy.

Maybe the way the path works is that you meet all of these guys before The One who prepare you for him. They show you how to deal with the bad and what good you want in a guy. Maybe thats all The One really is - they're just a mish-mash of all of the great qualities about your exes with none of their bad traits. And the bad traits that they do have are livable and manageable.